Making Goals: How, And What's The Point?

Most people don’t struggle with setting goals.
They struggle with keeping them. Worse yet, they miss the whole reason and point of setting the goal in the first place! The why matters, and you can miss it. I did for a LONG time.

We usually start strong and have all the motivation in the world—new mindset, new journal, fresh calendar, maybe even a new social media handle to document our journey and hold us accountable…big vision.  But for most, somewhere between week one and week six, motivation fades. Life happens. Energy dips. No views. Results aren’t physically manifesting as fast as we want. Suddenly the goal feels heavier than the excitement that created it. That shiny object at the end of the long road ahead loses its luster, doesn’t look much closer, and we start to question if it is worth all the trouble it is going to take to get there.  We question ourselves if we can even do it.  We can even attain the goal we’ve set, and then fall back into old habits erasing the goal, leaving us frustrated and needing to start over.

We realize we set a goal with no real roadmap of attaining it. That’s where a simple formula can change everything:

Motivation + Discipline = Momentum
Momentum + Discipline = Goal (Change)

But there’s a deeper truth beneath the math—one that matters even more. I developed this formula at first missing the big picture.  It works for smaller, short term goals. It can be applied to long term goals as well, don’t get me wrong, but behind big goals like the ones we like to set for New Year Resolutions there’s usually something more.  The whole reason we set the goal usually isn’t even the goal itself, and is usually dependent on things we can’t control.  No spoilers, so let’s go deeper...

Motivation Starts the Fire (But It Doesn’t Keep It Burning)

Motivation is powerful. It’s emotional. It’s inspiring.

It’s the spark that lights the fire that gets you moving.  You NEED motivation.

Motivation is also unreliable.

Motivation can depend on sleep, stress, hormones, mood, weather, and circumstances out of your control. If your goals depend only on motivation, you’ll always be starting over.  It can be a crushing defeat, leaving you further away than before the goal was set.

Motivation’s job is not to carry you to the finish line. Motivation’s job is to carry you over the starting line.
Its job is to get you moving long enough to build something stronger: Momentum.  Even momentum, although harder to stop than motivation, cannot be relied upon alone.  There’s something missing in the formula of sustainably working towards the goal you want.

Discipline Is the Quiet Force That Changes Everything

Discipline doesn’t care how you feel.

Discipline is the decision to show up anyway—on the boring days, the hard days, the “nothing is happening” days.

Discipline is choosing the habit when the excitement is gone.  It is quiet.  It lies in choosing to stay the course when no one is looking.  Without it, you are likely to fall prey to distraction.

When motivation fades, discipline steps in.

When discipline repeats, that’s where momentum is born.

And momentum? Momentum is magic.  Like a freight train coming down the tracks it can be stopped, but good luck trying.

Momentum Keeps You “On-Track”

Momentum isn’t just progress—it’s identity change.

When you keep promises to yourself, something powerful happens:

• You trust yourself more
• You stop negotiating with your excuses
• You see yourself as someone who follows through

This is why discipline and momentum matter more than intensity.

One disciplined action, repeated consistently, reshapes how you see yourself. There lies a self-discovery moment where perspective and identity shifts.  It can be slow to creep in, or show up as a “Eureka!” flash realization. You may notice it first, or someone else might notice it first.  In my case, I had other people notice it. “Something’s different, you seem really focused. What are you doing?”.   “You look great!”.  I heard those while still halfway doubting myself.  I was still focused on the outcome, and that outcome was continually changing the farther down the road I got. Regardless, when it does hit you like it did me, your identity shifts.  Goals stop feeling forced—they feel inevitable.  And the road you’ve been taking suddenly becomes the greatest teacher you’ve ever had, and the lesson(s) going unnoticed become clearer.

The Specific Goal Was Never the Point

Here’s the part most people miss like I did:

The journey is more important than the destination. I heard that quip for a long time, and it made no sense to me.  Probably because I rarely followed through, relying on the specific goal I had set to determine my worth. I want you to read the three bullet points above again… that was the goal all along!  It was to change.  It was growth.  To prove you were capable, to trust yourself more, to discover a part of yourself that you were unsure of.  You felt a calling inside you to move in a different direction, or to move at all.  You just gave it a specific name.

The goal is just the container.

The real gift is who you become while chasing it.

Along the way, you build:

• Resilience
• Self-respect
• Patience
• Confidence
• Trust in your own capability

Even if the goal changes—or takes longer than planned—you are no longer the same person who started. And that version of you is stronger, wiser, and more grounded.  You start to see the inevitable speedbumps along the way are helping you, not deterring you.

That transformation stays with you long after the checkbox is marked.  And new checkboxes are created all the time, probably did along the way as you discovered more about yourself. 

Chase Goals for Who You’ll Become

So set the goal. Write it down. Dream big.

But don’t obsess over the finish line.

Focus on:

• Showing up today
• Keeping the promise today
• Practicing discipline today

My goals have evolved from an “I'm going to lose 20lbs.” mindset, to an “I am going to get in the best shape I can.” mindset.  It gives me room to evolve.  It opens up the container.  It erases the finish line. I can take it one day at a time, which has been vastly more stable. Sustainable.  And that, for me, has been a better place to be.

Remember:

Every disciplined step creates momentum.
And momentum doesn’t just move you forward—it builds you.

Motivation + Discipline = Momentum
Momentum + Discipline = Goals
But the journey + consistency = A stronger you each and every day. A new version to discover regularly.  An ever-evolving being into your best self. Someone you feel worthy of continuing to show up for.  Someone you want to take care of. 

And that?
That’s the real goal.

And it doesn’t have to look any particular way.